I have been looking for something for the past four or so years, and it turns out it was Tapestry! What's odd is that I first looked at Tapestry about sixteen months ago, but I had apparently not suffered enough at the time to recognize the relief that it offered.
Interestingly, Tapestry smells a lot like Spring (without the allergies). It's a dependency-injecting, aspect-oriented, proxy-building, clean and intuitive way to approach the web layer. It's the first web technology that has really felt right.
I'm feeling less JCranky! I think I might even be having fun again, although I can't really remember what that feels like.